I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
