Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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