Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
