You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
