I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
