apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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