Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
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