Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
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