So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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