sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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