mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
