I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
