I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
