do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Randomize
