what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
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