For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I intend to get homeless drunk
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
