He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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