Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
