Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Randomize
