i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Randomize
