Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
is it fun? or sober?
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