David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
