after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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