VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
