But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
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