i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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