OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
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