everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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