I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
BRING THE BAGELS
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Randomize
