He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
It all started with a game of naked twister.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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