you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Randomize
