she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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