real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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