She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
