Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Randomize
