R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
