Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize
