She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Randomize
