they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
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