is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
