His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Sober January is a disaster.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
