You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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