I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize