i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Randomize
