Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Randomize
