I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
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