I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Randomize
