Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
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