I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
He? As in you personified your dick?
Randomize
