did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
